I was reading a Facebook thread where someone proudly announced, "I've thrown away my bathroom scales! I'm no longer going to weigh myself. I feel better letting my feeling and intuition tell me when I've had enough food."
The author of the post was supported by other women struggling with body image issues and societal pressures they experience when they see images of airbrushed models in magazines and movie stars on the red carpet. (Another woman announced that she took away her mirror so she wouldn't see the big belly and cellulite every morning.)
Reality Check: The scales and mirror are not the enemy. The scales and the mirror are simply tools of accountability. When used correctly the tool tells you where you are in relationship to where you want to be. The problem is not the information the scale gives you, it's the meaning you create from the information. That's when accountability becomes a problem-- we use accountability as a judge instead of a witness; a whipping stick instead of a ruler. Marlene Chism speaks about this in depth in her newest book, No-Drama Leadership where she devoted an entire chapter to accountability.
The real enemy is not the tools we use for accountability. The real enemy is the voice inside the head--that inner dialogue and self-talk that creates meaning. The invisible inner communication always manifests into the spoken word, and the spoken word into decisions and actions. The decision to avoid or to deny is based on a desire for short-term peace, at the risk of an unwanted long-term result. The paradox is that whatever you avoid will expand and get your attention later. In other words you can become aware through choice or through circumstances.
In our personal lives we avoid the scales and the mirror. In public safety we avoid the difficult conversations, we avoid performance reviews, and we avoid the responsibility to develop and grow our people. We do so because we don't know how to master the emotional and mental energy surrounding the things that make us uncomfortable.
Avoidance can work short term, but there's a problem with long-term avoidance: You weigh what you weigh whether you know it or not. You look how you look whether you accept it or not. People either approve of you or they don't without your permission.
The real problem is that we confuse accountability with judgment, and we confuse opinion with truth.